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Dating: the 6month interview

Dating. What is this selfish quest that in reality calls out ‘what will you do for me’, ‘how will you make me happy’.

In reality dating is merely a 6-month interview; a job opportunity where you work effortlessly and are occasionally rewarded with benefits. Or maybe you don’t work effortlessly but get benefits anyway.

What ever happened to genuine, sincere people looking for companionship, friendship, romance in a very lonely world…I’ll tell you–years of dating wounds, dating baggage. It’s like hiring someone who tries to bring the union down on you…once you do manage to fire them and get a job posting out there, you’re a little paranoid during the interviewing process, asking yourself if you’re bad luck will repeat?

I wonder how many view relationships like business partnerships (you have to believe that celebs & politicians do this [can we say Bill and Hillary Clinton]). I support you, you support me. I make you look good, you make me look good. We don’t really love each other but at least we aren’t alone.

One posts an ad, puts themselves out there, makes themselves vulnerable, a target to those hungry job seekers. As a ‘job seeker’ you must jump all over the new opportunity. You need this job. Applying is just the beginning. Creativity, charm, and wit should accompany the response to the ad. Then you wait, fingers-crossed, heart beat escalating awaiting the rejection or the invitation to an ‘interview’.

You must be aware that you and several others, maybe 10 to 50 a day, are also applying for this newly posted position, eager to showcase their ‘qualifications’. One of the primary keys is to never hesitate. You never know if they already found someone who has met their qualifications and they’ve moved them to the next stage…the trial period. Maybe there was a referral from a friend…now how can you compete with a referral from one of their friends.

So the day of, hours before the interview you iron your best clothes, put on your best smile, polish your most elegant pair of shoes, maybe even give the vehicle a washing, and with an attempted boast in confident you venture out. Maybe prior to you even pondered some appropriate conversions.

Do you bring something with you? A fruit basket maybe? Are you suppose to arrive empty-handed? What will your competitors do? You should definitely bring your resume.

“So how many years of experience do you have?” Oh dear. Good luck there. Maybe they want an amateur so they can train them, mold them in their own ways. Maybe they want an experienced, mature professional that can just jump in and go.
“What can you do for me?”

And of course you have to request questions of them: “Do you micro-manage?” “Can we discuss some of the benefits being offered?”

Maybe the interview goes so well you get to tour their “offices”. Maybe you’re even given a trial period…maybe the next morning you wake up and found out you weren’t quite as qualified as you thought you were. Maybe their expectations were slightly too high.

Dating is a 6-month interview. It’s about putting your best foot forward, impersonating the confident, showcasing your best and harboring your weaknesses. Once the 6-months are up the efforts decrease, the flattery dismisses, the dental plan gets dropped, no more bonus checks. Then that moment comes when you hear those painful remarks you’re fired. “You can’t fire me cuz I quit,” you shoot back (attempting to get the upper-hand). Then you’re given one of those boxes to put your belongings in. After 2-months of feeling sorry for yourself you decide to repeat the process…you start applying again.

© 2008 Ramblings of JayS.